Do you know a First World Problem from a Real Problem? Do you have the first fucking idea what it’s like to live somewhere without fast internet, clean drinking water or squid-ink pasta? Take Sweary Bear’s quiz to find out!
1. I’m so tired all the time. I think it’s because:
a) My chakras are all out of whack;
b) There’s a flickering light near my desk;
c) I eat too many carbs after 3pm; or
d) I have to get up early to search the garbage dump for scrap metal.
2. I couldn’t get to a job interview for a Social Media Expert role because:
a) The GPS on my iPhone was fucked;
b) The air conditioning in my car made my hair too frizzy;
c) I got stuck in the lift for a full twenty minutes; or
d) My legs were blown off by a land mine.
3. Today at lunchtime:
a) There was too much tofu in my salad;
b) There was no dressing on my salad;
c) There was a fucking hair in my salad; or
d) There was cholera in my salad.
4. I hate it when I miss:
a) Jersey Shore;
b) My laser hair removal appointment;
c) The good old days when teenagers weren’t so fucking disrespectful; or
d) The opportunity to go to school because I have a vagina.
5. My parents are soooo embarrassing because:
a) They still give me Christmas presents from Santa;
b) They’ve never heard of LMFAO;
c) They don’t know how fucking embarrassing they are; or
d) They were killed as part of an ethnic cleansing campaign.
RESULTS:
Don’t be fucking stupid. You don’t really need to check here for the results.